Who Does It

So, who changes the water cooler jug? We had an unending supply of water jugs in an office I once worked. I could bring my cup to the cooler at any time during the workday, pull down the lever and always heard the inevitable glug, glug. And it made me wonder, “Agua supply is getting low. What do I do if I take the last of this water? Do I, my 5 foot, 3 inch person, have to pick up one of those huge jugs placed at the side of the water cooler and flip it onto the cooler? How could I do that?” You just know (or at least I do) there would be massive spillage. So, I finished filling my cup and sneaked away to my office. I waited two hours. Then, I coyly went back and peeked at the water level of the cooler. Almost to the top! Cool! Someone else took on the burden. But who? Who are the mystery people who lug these massive blue bottles upside down onto the water cooler? I sat right by this watering hole and I never heard anyone grunting in effort and then hearing a click of the juggernaut going into the water contraption. And, what happens to the small amount of water that was in the prior bottle? Is it thrown out? Is it put on the plants? Does the changer just chug it?

Greetings for the Day

What is proper office etiquette for saying hello? For instance, if you’re new to the company. You’re wandering around, most likely trying to remember where the building designer hid the ladies’ room and on the way you pass lots of offices. What do you do with this encounter? Do you look into the office? Catch someone’s eye? Introduce yourself or scurry by quickly with your eyes focused straight ahead in the hopes of finding the elusive water closet?

Then there’s the time you’re walking toward the cafeteria for a bagel despite having had cereal before you left home but that was 2 ½ hours ago and your stomach is sending you a strong message and you see Pete. So, you say hi. Two hours later, you’re walking to a conference room and guess who is passing you? Pete! “Hi again!” you sort of half-laugh. Then, an hour and a half later, you’re both in the break room. “Guess this is my lucky day!” you falsely smile. Time to figure out something more to say, “So, how ‘bout them Mets?” forgetting that you don’t follow sports and aren’t even sure it’s baseball season.

Give Till it Hurts

Has anyone ever thought, “This job is costing me a fortune!” I certainly have. Within three months of being hired in one company, I supported an associate in a walk, chipped in for boss’ day, the boss’ birthday and another associate’s birthday lunch. I’m terrified what December will bring.

The unknown of the gift dynamics in the work space during the holiday season is enough to make you take a leave of absence until February. You know, perhaps schedule some surgery. On a side note, if you already met your medical insurance’s ridiculously high annual deductible, an operation is cheaper in December than January since in January the deductible clock of doom starts over again. Just a little money saving tip there.

But I digress. If you do decide to show up for work every day in December, who do you buy gifts for? Your boss? Your boss’ boss? Your co-workers? People who report to you? People you worked with on a project? What if you miss-guess and someone gives you something and you didn’t get him/her something? Do you keep a supply of gifts at your desk for an instant rebuttal or wait to see if they give you something and then say, “Oh I was planning on bringing in everyone’s gift on the last day before the holidays” and then stop at a store on the way home that night?

Once you’re in the shopping mecca instead of being home on your couch with a glass of wine, how do you determine an acceptable gift and price range? Is wine appropriate? Is it presumptuous? ‘Yeah, I figured you tapped into one of these babies after you get out of this zoo so here’s a freebie.”